Monday, April 19, 2010

Coming to Terms with my Lack of Omniscience

When I don't know something or can't do something, it frustrates me. Which is nothing new to humans in general, and considering all the things we'll never know/understand, and all the things we can never do, it makes life very frustrating! There are a million things I will never understand (like tax forms!!!) and a million things I cannot do (like fix my car or prepare a gourmet meal).

However people sometimes come up to me when viewing my artwork and say "oh wow, you have such skill!" And, when I'm talking, (or typing, usually,) people say things like "you're so wise and insightful." The problem is, I can't really accept this as true. Most of the time when I TRY to draw or paint, I end up with nothing. Or when I TRY to type/talk etc... I stumble on my words and can't think of a thing to say. However, what I'm good at, is channeling. Call it spirits, muses, the collective unconscious, whatever you will, it speaks to me and comes through in what I say sometimes, and through my art.

So I feel a little guilty accepting complements. When accepting complements like "oh you're so skillful, and wise" I just smile and say "thank you." Because if I try to deny them, people get offended... because they just tried to offer a piece of goodwill towards me and I am essentially denying it. And obviously I would be perpetuating a lie if I agreed with them. After all, no one gives complements like "oh, you channel so well" and "your muse must be so talented" and "congrats on being in tune with the universal unconscious!" Instead they just see the end result and think that it all came from me! Sorry to disappoint, you guys! I really don't have any special skill!

2 comments:

  1. Hi-

    now it all makes sense. I always "knew" you were an 'old soul'. Now I understand you are many that 'speak' through you. Wonderful.

    Love to you
    Gail
    peace....

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